i’m aware
you aren’t there
but i still stare
i guess i still care
you were never fair
now you’re somewhere
hands in a new pair
breathing in that new air
i am your biggest scare
push your decency down the stairs
finding someone like me is rare
i know i’m still there
that you care
(hold your stare)
(keeping that ring you wear)
(you’ll always be there)
but who am i
to fall & stay in love
with someone who never cared if i cried
not even at our peak
we’ve had more than enough each other
but i always let you back in
puppy eyes, ‘please’ , ‘it’s not the same without you’
it’s not me
it’s nature
science
chemical
keeping me here
what have you done to me?
do you also have days where the world feels empty because i stole it from you?
what is existence without resistance?
what is love without a little war?
is it even worth it?
It’s sad we bleed so deep for each other when we’re basically strangers with familiar touch
Because I’m sticking with the fact
that you’re always coming back
because I have what she lacks
Circles revealed in your tracks
I’m in ink across your heart
I was there when you fell apart
I’ve been with you from the start
We’re a disastrous piece of art
You’re in deep this time aren’t you
You’re so quick to get the tattoo
Look deep inside can’t you just be true
We’re wasting time it’s nothing new
At one point you loved me face it
Now you don’t? Another lie left lit
Always been me and you it’s basic
I’ll be here every time every shift
I’ll keep making me
Greater than can be
More than you could dream
See things you’ll never see
snapping necks with my degree
Living large that’s the key
(I know you wish you were with me)
forever a fool for you
your favorite tool to use
pick me up when you need
a little pick me up indeed
blindly i know you’d choose me
our hearts on the same frequency
every beat a desperate need
to relive those risky memories
i just want the secrets, hide
behind closed doors, ride
the high, we feel so alive,
you are alive and forever mine
I’ll blame you for all of it
You’re good at causing shit
I’m good at forgiving it
I am a monster today
because you had your way
I never had my say
But maybe I miss you
Do you think about me too?
I get it we’re old news
But wasn’t it supposed
to be me and you?
you cried
when i talked to the sky
didn’t matter that
it wasn’t another guy
i had no one
you made sure
killing you
was my cure
i’ll lick the blood off my blade
no need to hide in dark and shade
they know
who you are
what you’ve done
They are quite aware
of the demon you’ve become
they say everyone deserves love
but i hope you get none
if there isn’t enough
In my skin
I can’t win
Tried to run
Had no luck
Ended up
Back in the dust
I felt so high
Could never die
I know you’ve tried
But I’m still alive
Fight and scream
Until the death of me
Rock bottom is my home
The only love I’ve ever known
i live in a perfect place
we don’t allow people like you, waste
try & fail
back at the beginning of your tale
we accomplish
while you simply fade away
go back to your town
(you’ve got nothing to say?)
i guess a quiet tongue is a truthful one, you’re right
but one day your conscious will win the fight
(leave me out of it)
Flying by the college station
Onto Uni, the next tier
Never did I think I’d be here
To waste my power is a sin
I love the towers that surround me
Make me feel safe, at ease
Finally up off my boney knees
It was all possible I just had to leave
No one can track me
On a fucking cell phone screen
I am completely free
If she knew what you said
The double life that you led
She’d still end up in your bed
I know I’m still in your head
Causing the motions again
But hun I wish you were dead